Cold, teething, or hating mommy back at work.

Emma has stopped sleeping through the night.

I treasured every minute of our 4-10 hours of sleep at night, but now it is gone. She is now sleeping from about 9-12, up for a feed, and then up every 2 hours until 7. I can't tell if she is still trying to adjust to occasional day care days, or if her snuffles are really a cold that she isn't shaking, or if the hand chewing and drooling are pre-teething signs that she is uncomfortable with. She has also been super fussy at bedtime again, broadcasting her exhaustion by wailing. We swaddle her up, sway/rock her to sleep, then 20-40 minutes later she is screaming again. It is taking 2-3 cycles to get her down at night now. Last night we gave her gas drops, then tylenol drops, and it seemed to help. She gave me a 3 hour block then a 4 hour block of sleep, so it was an improvement. Today, she has been sleeping most of the day and her snot is yellowish/green. I hope if this is a cold she has been brewing, that it is finally peaking so it can go away! When she wakes up, we are going to go to the health food store and pick up some homeopathic teething drops. I hate to see her so uncomfortable. I have some teething rings in the fridge now. It feels early for her to be teething, but what do I know!



She is awfully cute when she chews on her hands though...

Back to work

Last week was my first week back to work. I cried my eyes out dropping Emma off at daycare and was quite a mess during my clinic day. My brain was not all there and I was not as thorough as I usually pride myself on being. I just wanted to be home with Emma, singing to her, watching her track on objects, and learn to manipulate her world. The next shift was at my teen clinic where the staff threw me a welcome back/congratulations on the new baby party. It was lovely and helped ease some of my longing to be with my baby. They even kept the schedule a little bit light for me so I could get home to her early.

I know I'm supposed to be a modern day woman who has a career and is a great mom at the same time, but I just want to be home with her. On Friday, we went to baby and me yoga at the studio I did my prenatal yoga at, and it felt so good to be there. There was another mom I met while pregnant and we got to meet each others babies. It made me want to be able to do those kinds of things all the time, not just on days off.

We bought Emma a few more toys on Sunday, and Shawn was able to place one of her new rattles in her hand. She grabbed onto it, and actually pulled it into her mouth. She is completely tracking on objects now, even moving her whole head against gravity. She is tolerating tummy time for longer stretches. I think we made it for 2 minutes today without fussing, and she is holding her head up beautifully. Last night, she turned herself halfway over, and then back onto her back. Shawn was laying on the quilt with her and I was walking up the stairs, so we both saw her do it. It's all these firsts that I hate to think about missing while at work. Between my part-time status and daycare, it's not like I am bringing home much money! I do love what I do though, I will give it a little more time. You'll just have to put up with my whining a bit more :)

Emma laughed

Emma is almost 3 months old. I can't believe how much she has changed. She laughed for the first time the other night. It was one of the most beautiful sounds I have ever heard. When Shanti and Mira came to visit us, Shanti taught me some dance moves to nursery rhymes to do with Emma. I was doing her favorite "one for the money" and on "four to goooo" when I wiggled her arms, she giggled. She did it four more times, smiling and kicking her feet in anticipation of the big finish, so I know it wasn't a fluke. Shawn got to see her do it too and is just as thrilled as me.

I took her to Day Care for the first time this week and it tore me up. I cried as soon as I walked out the the door. It was only for about 4 hours but it was terrible. I go back to work next week. It will only be 2-3 days a week, but I am dreading the time lost with her. I am seriously tempted to stay home with her, but I owe it to myself and my job to try to work for a while. Shawn says we can probably make it work on one salary, we'll just have to give up some luxuries. Staying home with Emma is worth giving up the maids, right? Right? I know. Priorities :).