Four months old

Look at those blue eyes!

Emmaline is four months old now. She has found her feet and is pretty close to getting her toes into her mouth. Everything else is making it's way into her mouth as she gets better control of her hands. It is amazing to watch her advance every day. She is getting good at grabbing rattles (and mommy's hair) and webble-wobbling back and forth. She rolled over twice a few weeks ago, and hasn't since then. Her smiles and laughs are amazing. I love it when she sees me and smiles, it fills my heart with incredible joy. I knew I would love my baby, but I had no idea how much. This is truly the most awesome thing I have ever experienced.

Shawn is such a good daddy too. He is upstairs singing her to sleep right now. I love seeing her in his arms. He's been doing a good job when I have to work my 12 hour shifts, and she has even been asleep by the time I get home a few times.

I do miss her sleeping through the night. It's been about a month of sleeping 2-4 hour stretches and I think it's her new normal. I know you can start some non breast milk at 4 months and maybe it will buy me some sleep, but I still hesitate. I don't know if I am ready to move on to that yet. She is starting to show some interest in food. She likes to sit on our lap while we eat and has been watching us put food in our mouths, but I'm not going to push it.

We took her to Rehoboth Beach, Delaware a few weeks ago and it was super cute. She didn't care too much for the water, but the pictures are pretty fun! The water was too cold, so we just let her feel the sand on her feet and let the water just touch her toes.

Emma's first swim

Our friend's Pranay and Elizabeth have moved to Baltimore with their daughter Zivia who is 5 weeks younger than Emma. Their townhouse has a fantastic pool that we took Emma and Zivia to. Zivia was not at all pleased with her swim, but Emma seemed to have a good time. Unfortunately, Shawn was at work and couldn't go so he is very sad about missing Emma's "first" of anything. He is off this week though so we should be able to go again soon.

Cold, teething, or hating mommy back at work.

Emma has stopped sleeping through the night.

I treasured every minute of our 4-10 hours of sleep at night, but now it is gone. She is now sleeping from about 9-12, up for a feed, and then up every 2 hours until 7. I can't tell if she is still trying to adjust to occasional day care days, or if her snuffles are really a cold that she isn't shaking, or if the hand chewing and drooling are pre-teething signs that she is uncomfortable with. She has also been super fussy at bedtime again, broadcasting her exhaustion by wailing. We swaddle her up, sway/rock her to sleep, then 20-40 minutes later she is screaming again. It is taking 2-3 cycles to get her down at night now. Last night we gave her gas drops, then tylenol drops, and it seemed to help. She gave me a 3 hour block then a 4 hour block of sleep, so it was an improvement. Today, she has been sleeping most of the day and her snot is yellowish/green. I hope if this is a cold she has been brewing, that it is finally peaking so it can go away! When she wakes up, we are going to go to the health food store and pick up some homeopathic teething drops. I hate to see her so uncomfortable. I have some teething rings in the fridge now. It feels early for her to be teething, but what do I know!



She is awfully cute when she chews on her hands though...

Back to work

Last week was my first week back to work. I cried my eyes out dropping Emma off at daycare and was quite a mess during my clinic day. My brain was not all there and I was not as thorough as I usually pride myself on being. I just wanted to be home with Emma, singing to her, watching her track on objects, and learn to manipulate her world. The next shift was at my teen clinic where the staff threw me a welcome back/congratulations on the new baby party. It was lovely and helped ease some of my longing to be with my baby. They even kept the schedule a little bit light for me so I could get home to her early.

I know I'm supposed to be a modern day woman who has a career and is a great mom at the same time, but I just want to be home with her. On Friday, we went to baby and me yoga at the studio I did my prenatal yoga at, and it felt so good to be there. There was another mom I met while pregnant and we got to meet each others babies. It made me want to be able to do those kinds of things all the time, not just on days off.

We bought Emma a few more toys on Sunday, and Shawn was able to place one of her new rattles in her hand. She grabbed onto it, and actually pulled it into her mouth. She is completely tracking on objects now, even moving her whole head against gravity. She is tolerating tummy time for longer stretches. I think we made it for 2 minutes today without fussing, and she is holding her head up beautifully. Last night, she turned herself halfway over, and then back onto her back. Shawn was laying on the quilt with her and I was walking up the stairs, so we both saw her do it. It's all these firsts that I hate to think about missing while at work. Between my part-time status and daycare, it's not like I am bringing home much money! I do love what I do though, I will give it a little more time. You'll just have to put up with my whining a bit more :)

Emma laughed

Emma is almost 3 months old. I can't believe how much she has changed. She laughed for the first time the other night. It was one of the most beautiful sounds I have ever heard. When Shanti and Mira came to visit us, Shanti taught me some dance moves to nursery rhymes to do with Emma. I was doing her favorite "one for the money" and on "four to goooo" when I wiggled her arms, she giggled. She did it four more times, smiling and kicking her feet in anticipation of the big finish, so I know it wasn't a fluke. Shawn got to see her do it too and is just as thrilled as me.

I took her to Day Care for the first time this week and it tore me up. I cried as soon as I walked out the the door. It was only for about 4 hours but it was terrible. I go back to work next week. It will only be 2-3 days a week, but I am dreading the time lost with her. I am seriously tempted to stay home with her, but I owe it to myself and my job to try to work for a while. Shawn says we can probably make it work on one salary, we'll just have to give up some luxuries. Staying home with Emma is worth giving up the maids, right? Right? I know. Priorities :).

Two weeks in Sunny California

We just got back from two weeks in California and boy to we want to move back!


Traveling with a baby was an adventure. Two weeks worth of baby stuff, plus climbing stuff, plus our stuff, is a lot of stuff.

Our first stop was to stay with George, Jen, and Lucinda where we became Godparents at a Welcoming Ceremony. Lucy absolutely loved Emma. She would get a very concerned look on her face when Emma cried, and cried herself when Emma left the room. She kept trying to pet her, and Emma didn't care. The ceremony was very nice, and Shawn and I are honored to have been chosen Godparents.



We then went to my sister's house in Atwater for the night, thinking it would put us closer to Yosemite than Concord. We were wrong! But we did get to meet Emily Elizabeth when she was 6 days old, so that was exciting. The cousins are 4 weeks apart, but since Emily was born 9 lbs 12 oz and 18 inches long, they were pretty close in size. Mary and I spent the evening breastfeeding our daughters while Shawn chased after Tommy.

We headed out of Atwater trusting our GPS named "Jane" to get us safely and swiftly to Yosemite. We knew we were in trouble when she had us turn on to Chowchilla Mountain Road and we saw a sign that read, "No access to Yosemite." But Jane had never been wrong before, so we kept driving. Emma was freaking out in the backseat and would not take the bottle from me. When the road turned to dirt and the next sign read, "Road closed from November to May, End county maintenance," we knew that Jane had led us astray. Unfortunately, we had neither cell service nor a map, and every time we asked Jane to recalculate a route, it would get worse. We turned around and eventually found a man in his garden and he got us on track. Never say men won't ask for directions, Shawn did it twice on this trip! Finding the condo was almost as much fun as finding the way to Yosemite, but we made it and it was worth it.

The condo was everything a condo in Yosemite should be from the snowshoes above the mantle to the Brown Bear toilet paper holder. We settled in, cooked dinner, and had a quite evening. Shawn was even able to climb a boulder just past the parking lot. Shawn climbed a little the next day, but I was pretty useless either climbing or spotting, what with the breastfeeding, diaper changing, and tending to other Emma related needs. Craig came the next evening and Shawn had a better climbing/spotting partner than Emma and me.

Tara and Chris's wedding was wonderful. Tara was radiant, Chris was beaming, and the setting was beautiful. I am so happy for the two of them. Shawn was a groomsman and I spent the whole ceremony bouncing Emma with Binky in hand in case she peeped. She did a good job and I was able to mostly pay attention the wedding. The day was hard though because Shawn had wedding duties leaving the bulk of Emma care to me. By 3 pm I was pooped and we still had a few hours to go. I don't know how single parents do it!

The next day was Mother's Day and we all went to brunch at the Wawona hotel. I greatly enjoyed my first Mother's Day and proudly displayed my beautiful daughter to everyone. I got a carnation and being the newest mother, lead our party of 18 into the dining room. Emma and Shawn were too distracted with the trip and the wedding to get me a present, but we didn't get our own mother's anything either, so I don't blame them.

After brunch, we made our way back to the Bay Area to meet Toni, David, Brooke, and Brooke's grandma Mary for dinner in Jack London Square. It was wonderful to see them and to show Emma off. We had a lovely dinner. There was another new mom at the table next us and we breastfed and bounced our babies for most of the evening, occasionally handing the babies off to another so we could eat a little something. After dinner we took Brooke back to San Francisco and stayed with her for a few days. It is always so great to be in the city, especially when we get to hang out with Brooke. We went to the new California Academy of Sciences, shopped cute baby boutiques and consignment shops, hung out and talked, and even had Sushi delivered.

Then it was on to Livermore for the last few days with my family. Emily had filled out a bit since we saw her the previous week and it was nice to spend time with everyone. Katie came down from UC Davis for a few hours and got to meet Emmaline and Emily. We had nice family dinners, played with Lily and Tommy, and I even went to Dad's middle school production of Jekyll and Hyde, (which was very cute!) Mary, Emily, Brian, Tommy, Shawn, Emma and Itook a day trip to Castle Rock for some climbing/hiking. Tommy had a great time crawling and falling all over the place, and Shawn got some good climbing in. Mary wins the hard core mom award for breastfeeding while hiking at 2 weeks postpartum. They were really good sports and we all had fun. Dad let Shawn and I drive his cute convertible Smart car to a fantastic breakfast with Dad and Alyson. You just can't get Linguisa in Maryland.

The trip was great and as always, made us homesick. I really hope we can find a way to get back. There is so much more to draw us to the west coast, and not a whole lot to keep us in Maryland. We love our home, but it's just a house. We can be happy in another house, right? It's our family and our stuff that make it a home. We'll see what we can come up with in the next year. I'd like to have some money saved up and be able to rent our house until the market picks up enough to make a better profit. Then maybe we'll rent in California until we are sure where we want to be, or maybe get a VA loan and buy soon to take advantage of the low rates and prices now. I don't know....

Two months old today!

My little one is two months old today. The time has flown by. Emma is cooing, smiling, and tracking like crazy. She is sleeping anywhere from 4-7 hours a night and breastfeeding is going well. She still gets super fussy in the evenings, but we have been giving her simethicone drops for gas and it seems to be helping. It's amazing how different Emma looks every day. One day her face is chubby and cute, and the next day she is long and lean. Most of our pictures are when she is sleeping, which is super cute, but we keep trying to catch her smile. In her alert pictures, she always looks the same, mouth open and wide eyed. She is super cute and we love her. We are in California now for Tara's wedding and visiting family and friends along the way. (more on that later...)